“ All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.” Psalm 139:16. NIV.
I was just leaving Quito, heading to the coast to visit Clara and Alicia who were staying there because Alicia needed to be out of the altitude in Quito. The phone rang and it was Clara saying Alicia was not doing well and may not make it through the night.
Fear and all other kinds of emotions flooded through my body and mind as I made the six hour journey down through the mountains to the coast. Alicia was going through a very dark time and was struggling to stay alive. I struggled with thoughts of just letting her go and the opposite of doing everything to keep her alive.
I struggled with what letting go really means. Some say it’s emotionally letting her go while others imply some passive assistance in your loved one’s death.
In faith Job worshipping saying, “ The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away: May the name of the Lord be praised.” Job 1:21b. God declares In Deuteronomy 32:39, “ There is no god beside Me. I put to death and I bring to life, I have wounded and I will heal, and no one can deliver out of My hand.”
Thinking about these two verses made me formulate how I would respond to what I would encounter at the end of my journey. Job 33:4 says, “ The Spirit of the Lord has made me; the breath of the Almighty gives me life.” So as long as the Lord gives the breath of life , it is right to hold onto hope and to nurture life. Leave everything into the hands of God.
When I arrived and looked at Alicia I knew she was close to death. Clara and I got on our knees and said, “ Lord do not keep her alive for our selfish needs, but May Your will be done in her life for as long as you choose. She is Yours and You have entrusted her to us. We love her but Your plan will always be right for her. “
Alicia suffered a lot through those early years of life, but God kept her alive and eventually we were able to find out what had caused all her problems. Today she is twenty years old and defying all the odds that doctors had given her. She is a daughter of the King. We are incredibly blessed to be part of her life. Often at night she gets her iPad and begins to sing along with the worship songs she has on it. She has a special relationship with the King of Kings and I often remark that she is an angel walking among us pleasing her Father in heaven. Yes, she is a fallen person with a personality that is not always nice but her simple like faith is such a blessing. Praise God from Whom all blessings flow.
God has made each one of us. God knew us before we were even born, and He knew the moment that we were conceived. He is present at every phase of development from that moment on. Psalm 139:16